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Co-Regulation
Co-regulation refers to periods of communication when people
are continuously adjusting their actions to each other, and
when both participants have the feeling that something new and
creative is occurring. Co-regulation is more than just being
responsive and sensitive. It is about being open to the emerging
possibilities in your relationship with another person and being
sufficiently spontaneous to allow for improvisation and innovation.
Co-regulated conversation between adults is one in which ideas
and feelings are mutually accepted, in which there is a continuous
flow of ideas and feelings, and in which participants have a
sense of discovering something new about themselves and each
other. Infants and young children can participate in co-regulated
communication as well. The way they do this will depend on their
age and communicative capabilities. Below, we present some examples
of co-regulating with a newborn infant, from Infancy: Infant,
Family, and Society, 4th edition (2001), by Alan Fogel in collaboration
with Mark Reese, Wadsworth Thompson Learning. In this book,
you can find examples of co-regulating with babies at other
ages. You may also want to try a Movement Awareness Exercise®
focused at early infancy.
Co-Regulating with a newborn
Co-regulating with a newborn infant is not easy. Newborns have
limited social skills. The time in which they are awake and
alert is relatively brief. With patience, however, co-regulating
with a newborn can be a wonderful and surprising experience.
A baby's first attempts to gaze at people and objects may be
brief. If infants are shown an object while they are alert,
they may learn to look for longer periods. For newborns, objects
should be brightly colored with simple shapes, such as a striped
ball, a mirror, a shiny bracelet, or a white paper plate with
a face painted in thick black lines. Hold objects about 8 to
10 inches from the baby's face. The infant can best focus his
or her vision at this distance. Hold the object steady or move
it slowly from side to side. Some newborns show a clear preference
for looking at certain objects. Watch to see which ones the
baby seems to prefer. Try to vary the distance and speed of
the object and see what happens.
An infant may enjoy looking at objects from different points
of view and from different positions, such as while being cradled
in mother's arms, lying on his or her back, or sitting in an
infant seat. A baby's attention may be attracted by objects
that make noise or music. Young infants are especially interested
in the high-pitched voices of caregivers.
It is possible that the baby becomes overly stimulated. He or
she will show this by turning away, crying, sucking a fist,
etc. When this happens, try to slow down. For example, try showing
just one object at a time and moving it more slowly in the baby's
visual field. If the baby still appears to be overstimulated,
the game should be put aside until a later time. Use your own
feelings as a guide to tell when the infant wants more or has
had enough. It is very satisfying when a baby actually engages
with you. If you are experiencing feelings of rejection or frustration,
it probably is a good indicator that your need to change your
play style or wait until a later time.
Although true eye contact does not begin until about six weeks,
infants will look in the direction of your eyes and face. This
is encouraged by gentle talking while holding the baby up near
your face. Cutting down on outside sources of stimulation will
also help encourage the baby to focus on the caregiver. If a
baby will not look at your face, cut back on the level of stimulation
and give the baby a chance to look at you. Remember that some
babies are slow to focus and can't sustain their attention for
long periods. It is important to not take this personally. The
baby is not capable of rejecting anyone at this age. Your patience
and understanding of the difficult time babies have in attending
will eventually be rewarded.
You can follow the baby's direction of gaze with your face until
the baby is looking at you and then give the baby a big smile
while saying "Hi!" Newborns like to hear soft whispers
and humming sounds. After the baby is looking at you, smiles
can sometimes be elicited by quiet, high-pitched voices, gentle
tummy strokes, and smiling faces. You will probably be so delighted
to be looked at in this way that these responses will seem very
natural to do.
Babies of this age like to listen to music, to be held and touched,
to be bathed and massaged. In all these activities, try to create
simple routines that the baby can recognize. Observe for signs
of overstimulation and give the baby a chance to rest and relax
if necessary.
Co-regulation may take some trial and error to figure out what
is best for you and the infant. When you really connect, it
is worth all the effort. Even though newborns have only a limited
capacity for attention and interaction, with some gentleness
and patience, the caregiver can be rewarded with periods of
mutually co-regulated attention and enjoyment. |
